Appreciating balance, India and the Contradictions of East vs. West Medicinal Practices

"You know a choreographed dance.." I said to my friend Amanda who wore a blank face. "Like the Bollywood movies," I continued.

"Agh, yes, and why are you so obsessed?" She asked curiously with a warm smile.

"I think I should have married an Indian man, so that we could have a dance that brought us together."

A man standing about 2 feet away from me "An Indian man, eh? I can help you with that." He said looking down at my ring with a smile that melted me... 

I smelled trouble and intrigue all at once. That was the beginning of an emotional affair with India that has continued over the last 6 years. India has followed me, haunted me. Curry powders and cardamom swirled around me in Dubai. 2 of my best guy friends are Indians. My indian students loved that I loved every little priceless thing about their culture. I convinced my colleagues that we had to do Dhandiya (the Indian stick dance) and Jai Ho, for the international day celebration. I am in serious withdrawal from masala, rogan josht and ramblings with Indian taxi drivers, oh cultural melting pot of Dubai.. Every year, I personally celebrate Holi, whether it be through a meal or a colorful bath or personal ceremony. I think that the celebration of spring and the color that it brings into our lives, the richness, the new life is immensely important to all of our well beings whether we recognize the holiday or not.

Being a child of a Czech, Scando and Scottish background, with sunshine yellow hair and blue eyes; every Indian I came in contact with had a right to be suspect. I am American. Strangely, India is not a country that Americans are overly detested. And I love color in my wardrobe, art, aura healing. I definitely believe in the power of yoga, karma, and ayurvedic healing; so the commonalities were there but we're human and sadly, if we have eyes that see we do judge books by there covers. Still the same, I always felt safe when I was in India and I never felt like an outsider. And my friends get it, how many times in the last 3 years have I been told, "You are just like an Indian in your way of thinking," or "I am sure you were Indian in a past life."

So, where is this random post coming out of. While, I have been ill the last few days and as I have over the last few years, I have a continued debate of eastern medicine vs. western medicine. I would like to believe that I could completely invest myself in not resorting to antibiotics and IVs and more, especially after 5 hours in the emergency room yesterday; inhaling pure oxygen, getting injected with 2 drips and finally, getting given the same prescription I had self-prescribed 3 days prior. Still, when in serious pain and after trying all the bells and whistles of holistic medicine in prior experiences, I believe it all comes back to balance.

At the moment, I am drugged up on some antibiotics but today, I began oil pulling, which is supposed to help with sinus issues (of which I have at least 1-2 infections a year). The last three days, I have been doing star anise, aniseed, ginger and clove steams. And finally, choking down whole cloves of garlic.. And I'd like to believe that it is actually the combination of both that are fighting hard to ensure that I can drink wine with good friends in Spain in 36 hours..

Fingers crossed.

Raised primarily in the midwest, but having spent 1/3 of my life living abroad across the continents, I'd like to think that I am taking a little bit of everything with me. Things are definitely no different when it comes to being the product of so many different medical systems: Capitalist insurance thievery of the US; Socialized brilliance of the UK; $3 doctor stops in Korea from everything to chest consultations to acupuncture; and alternative therapies in India. Clearly, I have no choice but to weed out the good and find a wealthy individual to fund my somewhat perfect system on a gorgeous relatively warm island. Or I could always move to France as Michael Moore romanticized the hell out of their system and French boys, wine, fois gras, I could get used to it...

Still, India somehow lingers more than the rest and whispers float from globetrotters that it's waiting. I hope so..

Is all this education helping us or hurting us?

So, now you've got 2 masters and a Ph. D or you're currently studying something new and wonderful in your field? Can you honestly reflect and look back at the knowledge that you have gained and used over the last number of years and say it's helped? Or has it hurt?

There are 3 areas I am going to discuss where education has affected the way we do things. The first will be medicine and our increased tendency to self prescribe. The next is our daily interactions with each other in our places of employment. Finally, the last is all of this education is causing us to dream big but really not know what the hell we want to do. In other words, our ability to focus on some sort of honed in bigger picture, has become impossible for a ton of over-educated people I know, including myself.

This afternoon, I participated in a game that was about building a consensus. It was a simple pretense but there was a twist. One group (mine) had a certain agenda to ruin and frustrate the other people playing the game, in other words, they were the antagonist. Quite often, the antagonist seems to be the one in the 'know' or the one who has more up to date education. It doesn't necessarily mean that it's right, but it's what is hot, what people are talking about and what the world is studying? So, why shouldn't everybody else be on board right?

But is this knowledge power; or is it a threat to ourselves and each other? Tonight, I went to the local pharmacy. Being a pro when it comes to antibiotics, I looked online and thought, what do I need for sinusitis? This is what it feels like, I've probably had it 10 times in my life: headaches, runny nose, tight chest, droopy sore eyes.. So, I google: drugs for sinusitis, I get a number and after doing 15 minutes of research, I head to the pharmacy. I ask the pharmacist or technician behind the counter if they have the drug. She finds something similar, asks me what it's for. I tell her sinusitis. She calls her supervisor and double checks that the drug is normally prescribed for sinusitis and bam, in 4.5 minutes, I have a 7-day prescription of antibiotics.

So, some of you in Asia or other places where this is normal practice, are probably wondering, what's the big deal? In the US, this whole thing would have happened in approximately 1 hour to 5 days depending on insurance and availability. The whole ability to go on-line, self-prescribe and feel better, doesn't seem outrageous.

That being said, last year, I did the same thing with a chronic ear infection and ended up with large balls of fungi growing in my ears (gross, I know)... Luckily, I personally only have the tendency to self prescribe when I know how I am feeling; or when it's a familiar feeling that I have had a number of times. Still, I have the potential to hurt myself and not many people in the way of me doing it, if I wanted too, which is scary...

The other big area that has been influenced by us all becoming ridiculously over educated is how we treat each other. Having worked in international schools for the last 5 years, I am surrounded by a number of individuals with varying levels of education. All of whom believe that they are doing things the best way. Then again, I have found that this is a realm where it is easier to work with people who are recently educated. Like medicine, education is constantly reinventing itself and just because something worked 30 years ago doesn't necessarily mean it's the best way to do things now.

To be current, stay on top of your game and be challenged by your environment in a positive way, I would recommend constant education in your professional lives. It's how we remain sane and determine what we love doing or hate doing.

Finally, the last realm of my very unfocussed ramble here, is just that "unfocussed ramble." Over the last 10 years, I have met some of the most creative human beings in their fields; the CEO of the Middle Eastern version of Ebay; a director of one of India's radical advertising companies; one of the world's youngest and up and coming chefs; progressive educators whose ideas rattle off their tongues like quick rappers and more. And with all of them, their ideas and whim are gorgeous and ridiculously energizing, but determining what's next or what's not in the realm of work is terrifying? All of the education that we have that transforms into passion sometimes creates the inability for us to focus on other realms of our lives that are not related to that educated passion. What a mess! A simple example is the use of facebook to express our opinions and ideas and share information with each other. How brilliant that we can communicate and express ourselves over the internet and this hyper intelligence has helped us to not only reflect and share our own perspectives but also be exposed to others. Still the same, I can't help but being overwhelmed and invigorated simultaneously, wanting to know more and more, and share, share, share.

Still, after re-reading this blurb, I think I've given myself a headache coming back full circle to debating on whether it hurts or helps? I guess the reason I feel it sometimes hurts is largely because of feeling unable to use all of my education to help people effectively, which comes back to knowing what the hell I want to do with the rest of my life...

"Oh how I wish I could shut up like a telescope! I think I could, if I only knew how to begin." Alice in Wonderland.. Lewis Carroll

My soundtrack for 2010

January: Meet me halfway. Black Eyed Peas, cause Heather and I busted a move every single time we heard it, from 7-11s to outside of Omani mosques

February: I’m waiting for the man- 2ManyDJs job fair, Wadi Bih and RAK half… I was waiting for the man to carry me to the end of this month

March: Time to Pretend- MGMT… because I started to pretend that Venezuela was going to be just like Spain.. right..

April: Change- Daniel Merriweather.. Big changes were dancing around me on so many levels

May: The Time (Dirty Bit)- Black Eyed Peas.. because May was a spectacular month for friends, fun, work, etc.

June: Make this go on forever- Snow Patrol. Essentially this is how I felt about my last few days in Dubai, being in Korea and being surrounded by all these gorgeous individuals I love.

July: One more cup of coffee- Bob Dylan… The amount of traveling I did this month, I felt I was always having one more cup of coffee, good byes…

August: Go Outside-The Cults, because this is exactly what you need to do when you are in a beautiful and crazy new city..

September: We no speak Americano- Yolanda Be Cool.. because speaking Venezuelan Spanish is virtually impossible.

October: Neon Bible- Arcade Fire. A rollercoaster of a month with work, boys, friends…

November: Be yourself- Graham Nash. One of my hardest months, personally and professionally but this song seems to encompass that you have to remain true to who you are.

December: More than a feeling- Boston.. because I know that the feeling of needing some people around me is just more than that.

Moths in the lamplight

I know the title of this article sounds like an album title. Probably a fun task for my next two days off; coming up with an album of songs that represent the year thus far; maybe a song a month. If you could generate an application that produced a list of songs, that would be pretty amazing too. I guess coming back as a techie in my next life would be interesting, I feel like I am being set up to do that by the overdoses of tech I absorb everyday. Nonetheless, I like the album idea, task, see how if I can start a trend. Will do and post the challenge to others, as it seems like a good thinking and reflecting task.

It's funny, the last time I wanted to start a tried was about 10 years ago in college, when I was sure that everyone should reuse Basmati rice bags, because A) they're cute and B) it's good for the environment (I realize how terribly blonde this sounds)... but it caught on a bit and for awhile canvas and reused bags were all the rage...

I spent the last 10 minutes watching outside my bedroom window, a moth flutter around the street light. It reflected and glowed against the damp, dim night setting, but it moved around magically like a little ember of light. And if I can see beauty in these moments, then I am either losing the plot, or feeling a bit better.

I guess it was yesterday when Ronnie was texting me at midnight, unable to sleep and I was 2 hemispheres away feeling exactly the same way. I am humbled to know that I am not the only one feeling lost in transition... I like to blame things on planetary alignment when things seem to rain down hard on a lot of people in different places around the world.

I went to the colonial area of Caracas today. It was a nice afternoon, talking about the differences in east and west and really being able to verbalize the purpose behind this project that I want to do. I think that I am ready to go to the wolves in January and go to get the money. I know what I am talking about and doing and I don't feel scared to go do it anymore. I mean, nothing good comes out of being afraid... I won't be hosting any parties in La Vega next year, but I want to continue to see the other side of Venezuela and the more I go out, the more I use my Spanish and the more I learn how to blend with what I wear, the more I am beginning to want to understand Venezuelanos and really share their stories and realities with the world.

Finally, I applied to lead the Experiment in International living again today. It's a summer program for high school students and I feel now I would be more capable than my application 5 years back. Additionally, in anticipation of a career change in 2-3 years, it would add something fresh to my resume that is a bit (only a tad bit) but off the beaten path of the traditional classroom... weehee, experiential learning...

I'll return to the burning lamp with fireballs doing aerials around the light... xox

The Ones Who Get It

Here's to the crazy ones....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oAB83Z1ydE

I'd like to believe and truly do so that my friends fall in this category. Each and everyone of them has their unique spirit, dreams, possibilities, quirks and individualities that make a greater contribution to the world.

And so does everyone obviously, but there's those that get it, that get me and I get their mission, their purpose, their laughter and vice versa. And together, we have magical moments that no one else can even try to duplicate, places and activities will NEVER replace people and their unlimited whims and wonders.

So, on this fine night when dreaming, I will go to that place, a new heaven, where all my friends are there, as we listen to classic rock, eat divine food and are surrounded by a canopy of green with occasional gentle rains. The room will be filled with laughter and stories of old, new from around the world, adventures that came and go, but moments that each of them can relate to because "they get it."

I miss you all more than I could ever say and just hope that we share more moments in this lifetime and pronto..

Intoxicating dance moves

We have been off for the last few days and as I sit down in my colorful apartment, with fresh flowers and a glass of red wine next to, through the many thoughts, talks with the other Heather, work, runs, agony with the shipment, I feel somewhat at peace.

That and this afternoon, I got to be a part of something else quite amazing here. There's something about dance that gets me going, makes me feel alive, exhilarates and intoxicates me. I have a total guilty pleasure for dance movies. Dirty Dancing was and still is a huge favorite even with its agonizingly painful script. Nowadays, the Step-Ups and Centerstages, remakes of Fame, I will sit through the excrutiatingly awful writing just to replay the dance scenes again and again and pretty much dance around my apartment doing, while attempting to do what the pros are.

So, when I saw the show "Lo Bailao" today, I was rejuvenated and uplifted and reenergized even though the rain has resurfaced. A flamenco show with women spanned across at least 5 generations with enough energy to awaken a sleepy caveman.. It made the call and drive to take Tango classes more necessary. It made me secretly long to come back as a Spanish women and revive this beautiful dance movement on an international level. I came home and tried to find some music to stomp around and create beats. I became obsessed for a bit, enough so that I want to write about how intoxicated I feel about dance. Perhaps in a past life, I was a dancer, but I don't think so, I am definitely baby giraffish when it comes to busting a move. Perfect for house, 80s and electro bouncy music and modern dance perhaps, there is some hope with flamenco to as it combines hips and arms, which could be to my advantage. Nonetheless, salsa, waltzing, etc, I can do it all, but not naturally. I took ballet and tap as a kid and disliked my teacher which caused me to drop out. Nonetheless, in high school, I returned and took modern dance for 3 years, and while I was never the star of the show, it was a perfect way for me to get the creative performance artist inside of me out and playing. That and dancing next to the inspiration of green fuzzy pants' boys at 80s' nights at Cains ballroom. In college, I busted one too many flip-flops on dance floors bouncing around or outside on big beach parties or fields or whatever it may have been. Since then, I continue to bust a move, but not enough and one weekend in with too many dance movies on hand, caused a sudden motivation to learn tango. That and I think it's a kinda sexy dance to learn when you're 30. You can still pull it off, if I can get rid of my silly demeanor for two seconds and apply the other far too 90% serious about life part to my dancing. This might be somewhat impossible given that dancing is such a release for me and I enjoy it because I don't take myself too seriously.

Anywise, the groove is in my heart, I gotta get my dance shoes on and get on the floor.

xo

Cooking a turkey and getting your hands dirty...

Yesterday, I completed another one of my 101 things to do in life, cooking a turkey alone. It turned out gorgeous.. I was compulsively nervous that it would take hours more to cook then anticipated or that it was not defrosted enough.

Preparing it was more fun than I would have imagined. I made a melted herb butter and got my hands right into the turkey by rubbing it under the skin and ontop. Before the wonders of Williams and Sonoma, where cooks were raw and real, we got our hands dirty. In fact, this is a metaphor for my current dilemma with life right now, that I am not getting my hands dirty enough.

As someone who trained as an artist for 4 years in university and spent 4-8 hours a day living in a studio, basking in the stiff clay chafing off my jeans or finding serenity in the darkness of the dark room, working with my hands is something that is an essential part of me. Perhaps, this is where my adoration for cooking comes for, much like the groove I would get into throwing pots for 6 hours listening to Bob Dylan or sculpting away to Macy Gray on my giant tables, making clay over a 6 pack of beer and Taj Mahal tapes.. Perhaps, this is why painting my apartment last week was therapeutic. Music and moments that went with them that made college and art combine together in a delicious combination. Having a physical product to enjoy, whether to eat or sit still and remind you of the process and the time in your life that helped/ caused you to generate such art.

It all goes back to balance and making sure that you are supporting those realms; the artistic, the monetary; the physical; the friends; the wanderer; the lover; the sister/ daughter; I guess ideally your work should really be about all those things. Finding that perfect balance is difficult and of course takes time, and just because you are good at something doesn't necessarily mean you should be doing it forever..

Mas, mas tarde... Buenas noches..