This morning, I woke up, still foggy, train horns blaring outside the window, the chug, chug, chug of each train passing by 3 or 4 times compounded with my tossing and turning and kicks from the Fraggle like blond toddler in my bed. I read my daily news dose while Pablo watched his morning 20 min fix of Peppa pig, while sipping chocolate oat milk. When I see his days, I somehow remember that it's such a shame we don't remember our early, early childhood, when the days of contentment, snuggles, inconsistency were so fresh and wonderful. I simultaneously reflect on how happy I am that he might not remember the before because I fear the days of happy parks and even regular parks may be a thing of the past. His future of schooling entails socially distanced spaces, masks, temperature checks and things that take the fun and freedom out of being a kid. The push of going back to school is pulling on my heart strings as I watch kids in France, sit playing alone in chalked off boxes. The song "World, Hold on" plays in my head on repeat, with little Twisted Sister speech bubbles of "We're not going to take it" plays up in the graphic novel being written in my head.
I went for a quick run this morning, 4 km, light and easy, up the beach boardwalk, and down along the water on the way back. It was 9:50 am when I left for my indefinite run and when I returned 10:30 am. There's a 6-10 am curfew for exercise in Spain but I have yet to see it enforced. As I cruised down the sand, the earth pulling me to it, inhaling the salt water, basking in the sun and golden sand reflections, and savoring the cool air whispering gently on my face, I noticed two police cars. One police officer got out, walked towards the beach. I knew that despite the awesome weather and earth calling my name to continue the run, I needed to not tempt fate. Cops are pushing 600 euro fines for breaking the quarantine rules. I curtailed and headed towards the apartment, past the police car and another police officer got out and said, "Go home." I said, "That's where I am headed." This encounter just reminded me while our feelings, our bodies, our hearts, our minds are all being pulled outside, we have to push ourselves to be reasonable and follow rules so that more and more freedoms can be restored in the future.
Pablo and I made popsicles this morning and then played with the house, and the world we've created in our living room. 1 pm rolled around quickly and our helper called to ask if Pablo could come to her house to play with her kids today. We were happy and excited for Pablo. He's been without kids for nearly 2 months but he was a little bit cautious. We prepared a bag with some comforts, raisins, chocolate oat milk and a couple of his favorite toys. When we went down to get into the car, he reached out for me, and Carolina, our helper, and her brother, had to take him away, gently pushing me away so it wouldn't be harder. I sat there, doing my best to pull back the tears in my eyes. I wish that I could sit and do my online classes, work, meetings, etc with my kid magically playing and entertaining himself in the background with few screens involved but the reality of the world right now and my energetic toddler who loves to play and involve others in his magical worlds, is far from that. When I received these images later, the weight on my shoulders was lifted for the moment.
We've entered this time in our lives where we have to sit down and it's easy to notice the pushes and pulls. Thank god though that balance is still a part of our charmed lives.
I went for a quick run this morning, 4 km, light and easy, up the beach boardwalk, and down along the water on the way back. It was 9:50 am when I left for my indefinite run and when I returned 10:30 am. There's a 6-10 am curfew for exercise in Spain but I have yet to see it enforced. As I cruised down the sand, the earth pulling me to it, inhaling the salt water, basking in the sun and golden sand reflections, and savoring the cool air whispering gently on my face, I noticed two police cars. One police officer got out, walked towards the beach. I knew that despite the awesome weather and earth calling my name to continue the run, I needed to not tempt fate. Cops are pushing 600 euro fines for breaking the quarantine rules. I curtailed and headed towards the apartment, past the police car and another police officer got out and said, "Go home." I said, "That's where I am headed." This encounter just reminded me while our feelings, our bodies, our hearts, our minds are all being pulled outside, we have to push ourselves to be reasonable and follow rules so that more and more freedoms can be restored in the future.
Pablo and I made popsicles this morning and then played with the house, and the world we've created in our living room. 1 pm rolled around quickly and our helper called to ask if Pablo could come to her house to play with her kids today. We were happy and excited for Pablo. He's been without kids for nearly 2 months but he was a little bit cautious. We prepared a bag with some comforts, raisins, chocolate oat milk and a couple of his favorite toys. When we went down to get into the car, he reached out for me, and Carolina, our helper, and her brother, had to take him away, gently pushing me away so it wouldn't be harder. I sat there, doing my best to pull back the tears in my eyes. I wish that I could sit and do my online classes, work, meetings, etc with my kid magically playing and entertaining himself in the background with few screens involved but the reality of the world right now and my energetic toddler who loves to play and involve others in his magical worlds, is far from that. When I received these images later, the weight on my shoulders was lifted for the moment.
We've entered this time in our lives where we have to sit down and it's easy to notice the pushes and pulls. Thank god though that balance is still a part of our charmed lives.
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